Dependency
I lost my voice this past Sunday morning. I had gotten a cold earlier in the week, and when I get a cough I lose my voice. So when I woke up Sunday morning not much noise was coming out. This was not the day for this to happen.
All I could think was: I needed my voice! I needed a voice to welcome students when they arrived at Elevation, to talk with Moriah over lunch, to run two Fusion leaders meetings, and give a message at Fusion Meal Night. Mark is in Hawaii this week, so Tyler and I were it. Tyler had so many responsibilities that I could not pass on my meetings and message to him. So by midday when my voice was almost nothing, I had to press on.
I am a talker. I love to communicate and ask questions. So this not-talking thing really isn’t my style. But, last night I found myself not relying on my abilities, but God. I did so much praying, and I asked everyone who would have pity on me to pray.
When 7 PM approached my voice started to come back. It didn’t hurt to say words, and I was feeling excited that God was answering my prayers. I got up to speak and apologized that they had to hear my voice. I told the visitors that I normally sound like a girl, but who knows what I sounded like that day. I spoke on Impact – making an impact for Christ.
But, something happened that night that moved me. God not only gave me my voice back, but he moved in my heart. The message I prepared to give to the students suddenly became a lesson God had for me. I felt like I was talking to myself, not a bunch of leaders and jr. high students.
I guess by losing my voice I also understood on a deeper level my dependency on Christ. Which caused me to realize that if I want to impact others for Christ, I must be fully dependent on God. To not trust in my abilities, but to put my trust in Him.
Dependency, it is a beautiful thing!
Jen
Olivia's parents (Larry & Anna) said,
November 5, 2008 at 3:03 pm
Jen – I just wanted to tell you of the impact that was made on Sunday night. Olivia brought one of her best friends from Middle School to Fusion as a guest. Her name is Cassie. She loved the whole night! When I asked the girls what they learned…and what was the message or talk, Cassie quickly said that it was all about how we impact others…our imprint on other people. She really got it! She was super excited about what she heard! You know that in Middle School you may be hard pressed to get more than a couple word response to a question, and yet the enthusiasm even rolled into this week. Olivia and Cassie have spoken about how some of the talking they have been doing is not so good and maybe has the wrong impact. I love it when the girls really get the concepts and understand that the application is something tangible and begin using the tools.
Olivia felt particularily sorry for your voice loss, but that is because she had just experienced a Mom with the same lack of a voice for that week! She understood each and every word you said because God had prepared her ears!
…and one last thought and praise…
When you are given the gifts to work and teach children, you will learn more than they do! Challenge, Accoutability and many Blessings…it’s a package deal.
Thank you for your faithfulness and God Bless,
~ Anna