The Face Of Fear

August 6, 2009 at 10:02 am (Uncategorized)

Control is a funny thing.  When you have it, it takes a lot of worry away.  When you don’t have it, your confidence can be shaken to the point of panic.  Another thought I had is that being in control can make dependence much more difficult.  A lesson I learned yesterday in a whole new way.

Yesterday I rode a triple tube for the first time ever here at camp.  Although I have driven numerous kids and family members to feats of wild crashing and high speed corners, I didn’t truly empathize with my many passengers.  However, when I got on that tube, all my bravery melted away.  I was full of fear.  I wish I wasn’t, but I was afraid and not in control of the boat.  I wasn’t in control of the waves.  I wasn’t in control of the other tube.  I was just out there, in the hands of God and the driver.  And believe me, the 10 minutes I was riding were the longest 10 minutes of my life.  A couple of times the tube launched into the air and I quickly thought that might be the time I get tossed off and thrown all over the other students.  But that didn’t happen.  I went sliding quickly over the side of the wake on a high speed corner and fully expected to go so fast that the tube roll, but it didn’t.  Finally it ended and I was truly finished with riding.  I was one and done with regard to tubing, but I did have a good time.

All my fears may have been realized if I would have had a major crash(I can now sympathize with what happened to Jen and Kate), but I didn’t.  I wasn’t in control and I made it.  The next day and no one remembers my ride, but I do.  It will stick in my memory for the rest of my life.  It gave me an understanding of the relationship between control and dependence in a whole new way.  God is so great in how he teaches us these lessons in the various events and ordinariness of real life.  I love the God of the impossible because he is also the God of the little things too!

Pastor Mark